It's crazy how much stigma you may face in your life.
I had never really noticed many that I may have been associated to, that I can remember, at least before becoming a Mum.
I feel like now, just around every other corner, there's a new stigma. And I'm absolutely sure that I'm not the only one that feels that way.
The first stigma I noticed, was being young, unmarried and pregnant. Everyone assumed that my pregnancy was an accident. I also once had a Doctor at a Medical Centre tell me that I shouldn't be pregnant without being married and asking where the Father was at the time of the appointment.
I've faced the well known stigma of being the mother that wasn't breastfeeding. Often no one asked about my situation before casting judgement, not to mention how outcast I was from a lot of Mum groups, I chose to even distance myself from having many Mum friends until I was past that stage just because of how much of a failure that stigma made me feel I was, at the time.
I faced the stigma of being a stay-at-home-mum. For a short time while it wasn't possible for me to work, I even had judgement passed by members of my own family for making the decision to stay at home with my baby rather than return to work.
Then came the stigma of being a single mum, I find that often it's assumed things must be so much easier, getting every other weekend to myself.
There's also the stigma that if I were unmarried, young and I'm now single, that not only was my baby unplanned, but I must also have been in a rushed relationship not thought through.
I now face the stigma of the young mum that has returned to work. It's true when they say you can't please everyone and boy have I learned just what that means.
All of this stigma in not quite five years..
I'm not going to use this post to explain any of the situations I have been in, just because that defeats the purpose of trying to abolish stigma.
It doesn't matter who you are in life or what you do with it. There will always be the busy bodies that pass judgment on you, no questions asked. Hell, there's even going to be the nosey people that do ask questions and still judge you.
Stigma sucks, it can make you feel boxed and at times very lonely. Stay strong and you, do you. It's your life and you can't live it for anyone else.
Photo credit; Bare and Wild Photography
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